I like the idea that came to me one day, that there are little “Doubt-Monsters” (DM) (see this post) that like to make us think negative thoughts and feel negative feelings that get in our way, preventing us from creating our best work.There’s a little DM called Fraud-Monster, haha, and he tends to visit every artist on this planet, I suspect!
Shedding the light on him is a really good idea. So I thought I’d share a bit of my own personal process, in answer to the question, “What does a musician do when uninspired, feeling like a fraud?”
When I feel uninspired, I stop.
Everything.
And I remember what Inspiration means to me.
Inspire also means in-breath… and it also has the root of the word “spirit” in it.
So it reminds me about the breath of spirit. When I’m uninspired, I’ve forgotten about this, and I realize I need to re-connect with what gives me life – breath – spirit.
The essence of that is the same as the essence of my music and all creativity.
Without remembering that, and touching the Source of it all, I am left flailing about purposelessly, and the things I do lose their meaning and become joyless.
So, when I’m uninspired, I need to remind myself of what’s truly important to me.
Sometimes re-connecting with myself in this way is easy, and sometimes it can take days…
There are specific tools and practices that I find helpful, and the Alexander Technique is right up there at the top.
Walking outside in the beauty of nature is another thing that usually lifts my spirits and changes my breathing right away. But sometimes, even that is slow to shift things for me. But I do it anyway, because the rhythmic movement and the support of nature are essential and soothing, and this touches my heart.
Then, sometimes I see something beautiful, too, and that inspires me and makes me smile.
Or I see a child laugh…or a bird fly by…
Or I see others suffering and it makes me feel my own suffering more deeply, and I realize this suffering is not mine – it is the suffering of all humanity. This makes my heart go out to the world, and the focus lifts off of my own misery for just a moment, lightening my burden.
Sometimes, feeling uninspired is a sign that I’ve forgotten how connected we all are, and I’ve stopped feeling the pain of the universe, because it’s just too much to bear.
But the only way to the light at the other end of the tunnel is through it, and the best pearls that shine brightly are found at the bottom of the sea.
So when I feel sad or overwhelmed or lifeless, I swim deep and look for the Light, and I breathe and feel reassured that goodness is indeed within. Within myself and all of humanity.
Hope brings me back up and out of the depths.
And throughout all of this, it is possible to express everything through my music…the pain and the ugliness as well as the light and the joy. I play for myself and I play for you and the rest of the world all around me.
It’s all in there and everywhere, waiting to be loved and accepted for what it is.
So… all in good time…. this too shall pass. This is my experience.
The answers lie in the asking and the wondering, and as long as we are looking for ease and light, we will find them, sooner or later.All in good time.
To me, this is how the creative process necessarily works, and inspiration will come when it’s good and ready, not one moment before.
… and just one more thing…
Fraud-Monster is the one that tries to get us to think it is our ego-personality that creates the music and does the inspiring.
Fraud-Monster wants us to forget that we are not in control of inspiration.
All we can really do is open up to noticing what is, with love and acceptance, waiting patiently while we look to beauty to reveal itself.
Love and Light are not man-made.
But we can participate in them, and appreciate them as Life’s Wonder.
How INSPIRING this is to me!!!
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section!
Jeniffer,
I am so touched and inspired by this blog. You have such an honest and direct way of infusing sound practical advice with thoroughly metaphysical insight. Thank you. You have inspired me today!
David
Thanks so much for taking the time to write, David. I’m touched, and inspired right back. Thank you. 🙂