Do you know what you want?
Believe it or not, this is a truly challenging question for many musicians.
I’m writing about this today because it came up in The Musician’s Mind-Body Breakthrough class yesterday, and it reminded me about how hard it was for ME to figure out what I actually wanted – especially after I got divorced (after 25 years of marriage) and found myself aware of the need to take full responsibility for my own life for the first time.
The truth is, I wasn’t used to being asked – or asking myself – what I REALLY wanted deep down. Instead, I would often just go with what other people wanted (as a natural “people-pleaser”), and either be happy about it or unhappy about it.
So, when I was faced with the need to make important decisions for myself, wow, that was hard!!
I soon realized that I needed to start off with baby steps. Recognizing the obvious. “I’m hungry. I want food.” “I’m cold. I want a sweater.” “I want to go for a walk.”
Giving myself the time to pause, clearly asking myself what I wanted, and making those desires very explicit to myself was good practice as I kept asking myself the bigger, harder questions… without expecting myself to come up with any answers right away.
Patience and faith are everything.
And, lo and behold… knowing my mind, wishes and desires, got easier over time! 🙂
If you have any difficulty knowing what you want (and getting it!), you might find it helpful to try what I suggested to my student next, along with the baby-steps I spoke about above.
Here’s what I suggested to my student:
“Ask yourself… RIGHT NOW, do I want to go in the direction of more overall ease and freedom, or more dis-ease and constriction?”
If you can answer that question, then you will find that you actually DO know what you want.
Nothing else matters as much as what you’re choosing in the present moment.
So start there, and start NOW.
And keep practicing this.
If you find that you desire more ease and freedom, that answer opens everything up and creates the space necessary to then take ACTION on this desire.
In my private coaching and group programs, I help musicians get super-clear about what they really want – in life and music – and I teach them the exact steps to effectively move towards more ease and freedom – in mind, body, spirit, and music – once they’ve decided that’s what they truly want.
If you’re interested in getting to know and express yourself better – in a very real and authentic way – and you want to experience A LOT more ease and freedom in every area of your life as a musician (even improving specific instrumental techniques with ease!), reach out to me and we can have a chat about what’s possible for you.
Message me here or email me at Jennifer@ArtofFreedom.me
I’ll ask you a few questions to see if we’d be a good fit to work together, and if it feels right for you we’ll talk about specific options. I look forward to hearing from you soon!