A violinist came to a recent coaching session and opened with a beautifully honest piece of self-observation.

“I have a habit,” he said, “of thinking too soon that I know something.”

Within minutes, that exact habit appeared in his body. When I asked him simply to raise his violin to his shoulder, he moved directly into the familiar motion on autopilot, without allowing himself even one moment of quiet presence first.

I gently pointed out that he had skipped the most important part, which is making the most of the time before acting – which I call the Golden Period – to come back to himself and release any excess tension he was bringing to the experience.

We slowed everything down and began exploring a simple question: “Where do you seem to be easing a bit?”

I asked him to be curious again and again, not because there was one correct answer he needed to find, but because each asking offered him another opportunity to notice something new.

Rather taking his awareness down into himself to analyze, control, or work everything out, I invited him to remain mentally free, allowing his body to give him information without rushing to interpret it through the habits of thought he already knew.

At one point, something changed visibly. His whole system softened, and the familiar effort began to release.

“How did you do that?” I asked.

His simple answer was, “I let go.”

That brief moment of letting go opened the door to something much deeper. He began remembering specific experiences from childhood, when playing the violin had been purely fun, before he knew enough to listen critically for every mistake, and before he had accumulated so many ideas about what he needed to defend, control, or prove.

For a moment, he was no longer trying to become a better version of himself. He was simply rediscovering something freer and more alive that had been there all along. ✨

Afterward, he described the experience with an image that captured it perfectly: it felt as though he were being asked to throw away his old shoes before he had received the new ones.

That can feel uncomfortable and disorienting. Our familiar habits may restrict us, but they also give us a sense of knowing who we are and what comes next. Letting go creates a temporary space in which we may not yet know how to move, create, perform, or express ourselves.

And yet, without that space, how can anything genuinely new emerge?

This is one of the experiences we will explore at Dare to Shine: Relax, Create, Contribute, my upcoming retreat for musicians, artists, and other creators near Amsterdam on October 24–25. 🌿

You’ll have a protected, supportive space in which to step away from expectations and familiar ways of working so you can experiment, play, and take meaningful risks without needing to prove or perfect anything.

Together, we’ll explore what becomes possible when you stop reaching so quickly for what you already know and allow greater ease, freedom, curiosity, and authentic expression to emerge.

Registration is now open, and early bird tuition is available through September 15, along with a couple of very special bonuses for early registrants. 🎻💫

If you’re curious and would like more information, get in touch with me for details. I’d be delighted to tell you more. Alexander Technique teachers and other educators and coaches are very welcome to join us!